radmad.ca

so about that rut i'm in

truth is
it doesn't take much for me to get into one
and that is likely because i have such high expectations
of myself
and out of life in general

not being content with mediocrity
propels me to strive for the most of myself
and of my life
including what i do on a day to day basis
in terms of my job
and also of the little tiny adventures
that make up the rest of my life


















thing about me is
i do love a challenge

so if everything was moving along smoothly
at the same pace for too long
i'd be anxiously bored and complacent

so alas

i am looking at an almost blank slade
of my life's next chapter
and deciding whether i will use
oil paint
chalk
or crayons
to draw my dreams
















some things i have either done or need to do:

• keep up with the early morning runs. getting up at 4:45am is good for my soul... and my body
• continue to bike to work.  my gams are starting to take shape nicely
• move into my new Studio location in downtown toronto and rebuild my client base.  my problem here is that in 6 months, i managed to start my own biz, doing something no one else in toronto is doing, get a waiting list of clients, get my arse on TV, radio, and in online and magazine articles.   I managed to reach all of my goals.  The thought of doing it all again as a result of having to move is making me kinda yawn and i really do need to find the motiviation to ramp up again
• that being said, i also hate being broke and may dabble in my previous vocation. i miss the mental and intellectual stimulation.  i don't get enough of that right now
• i need to get over the fact that i did not have closure with one of my first loves. this is having a bigger effect on me than i thought
• i also need to get out and have more silly little adventures.  all work and no play as they say

oh and in other news
never
ever
ever get a makeover

letting people who do not know me
have control over my locks
was a dasterdly error on my part

instead of a pic of the hack job
enjoy a picture of this giraffe
i had a visit with last weekend

oh hi

i wonder if there is a tally going
of people who start their blog post by saying
something like
"i haven't posted in like foreeeever"

yeah yeah

i have been tossing the idea around in my head
about laying this baby to rest
ala wayne gretzky quitting
while he still gots it

but then i realized that the only reason
i have not been posting is that i have had absolutely nothing
of interest to post about

well at least within the realms
of that which i allow myself to talk about in this thing

i have definately hit a plateau in life
and whenever this happens
i without fail
do something to shake things up

but this time
i'm at a loss to know what that "thing" is

leave it with me
i'll be right back with an update on stuff



oh and in regards to the hair
it is a tragic mess that is not worthy of pics
its like
but not quite like
i had a major body organ severed

the warm weather is totally turning things around
can't wait to blade
been biking
running
and getting back to the me i love to love

been getting good at gardening too
i guess
cause i've gotten pretty quick at weeding them out

sorry boys



crazy week ahead
media whoring
on TV thursday morning and then
makeover photo shoot in the afternoon

must line up a nicey nice date
for the evening
dolls need to play
and be played with

i have an intense attraction to johnny weir
























yeah yeah
i know