radmad.ca

hi,

i'm having fun in south beach
so much fun
that i have been on a bikini boot camp "time out"
since friday morning
i have been skipping out on organized events
to partake in my own
and the jennifer nicole lee chick (google her, hotter in real life. meh)
who is running it
is kinda having a hard time hiding her pissedoffedness at moi

whatever
this is my vacation

this place is crazy
insane

it is fashion week here
so i'm going to a big fashion show ce soir
i bought a pink glittery dress

there are 18 gay guys
for every straight one

weather has been amazing
food is incredible
bed sheets are 300 thread count
and i just got a massage

from..........

a gay guy


home sunday
with pics

so my camera is back
this little flicker machine
is fuk'n invincible




some dude grabbed my bag by mistake
whatevah
hope he's enjoying the tshirt he never quite sent back
with it

stick me in a situation
where i have to comply
with a structured agenda

and i may just self-destruct
into a million pieces

boot camp is happening for the balance of the week
kick my ass
i need it

i'm starting to read this book
get it and start reading

we shall discuss

i read before bed
and i'm usually pretty fuk'n tired
by the time i get there
so this will be not be an
expedited adventure

in other words
no need to buckle up

i would have pictures of my duathlon today
but some knob
stole my camera

RIP dear flicker
we have had over six years together
including two steal attempts
and now you succumb to the dirty hands of a scoundral



Akon is a fluff of insignificant idiocy
i can't believe he is considered an artist
he makes my core cringe

now these
are the lyrics and brilliance
of an artist...

Do you cum?
Together ever with him?
And is he dark enough?
Enough to see your light?
And do you brush your teeth before you kiss?
Do you miss my smell?
And is he bold enough to take you on?
Do you feel like you belong?
And does he drive you wild?
Or just mildly free?

shame on me for being negligent enough

so i am going to some
alliance atlantis media industry party tonight
it's at some undisclosed location
in the city

last night i ironically was sitting
at a bar
with the guy who may edit my karaoke audition film
small fuk'n world

i perhaps should have bought him a drink
or perhaps should not have told him
in jest
that his chick will probably dump him after
living with him for a few months



i wonder sometimes
if there is a "maybe don't say that" filter store somewhere
that ships same day

pitt got the entire stadium
to do the wave
he is a wave starTOR

i told him to do it
i am the wave delegaTOR



anita was flirty mcflirtorson
with some chick cheering for boston
but residing on front street
there was a business card exchange
and hopefully the start
of something magical





anita wore too much underwear
to the game
in fact
i think it doubled as a bra




engage pretty eye function

there's a good chance
you may fail miserably

still want to give it a go?

but is there a chance i may not?

yes

then fuk yeah
i do.

so for the third consecutive year
i'm doing the Niagara-on-the-lake Duathlon
on saturday
run 4km, bike 23km, run 4km

hello lactic acid

then on sunday, october 14th
another half marathon


in other news
superbad is dumb

i now have to read the encyclopedia
for a week
just to regain lost brain cells

i'm a dumbass

i bought tiks for tegan and sara
for their oct seventh show
and i wonder
but don't think
that my sister is gonna want to find another
maid of honour to give a speech
at her wedding THAT NIGHT

so then i went back on line
and got tiks for the monday night show

so now i need to unload the sunday night show
so i you want to go
then please let me know



and rhyme time is now over


maybe i will put them on craigslist
with tag names like
young
hot
sister
lesbians

and charge double

so they called me back
and i had an audition today
for that show called the List (see below)

i had to talk on camera
about how and why i am a karaoke junkie
and i had to sing
with no music
the national anthem
happy birthday

and a song of my choice

which was none other than
you're so vain

i rocked it

and by rocket it
i mean no glass broke

and i have to say
it is very hard to sing with no music
i do not suggest you attempt it at home

anyways
i hear back in a couple of weeks if it's a go

so yeah

unsolicited advice
is usually unwelcome
because it advises us
to do the exact opposite of what we most desire
yet
is usually what deep down what we know is best
and for the most part
this is because
it comes from someone who knows, loves and wants best for us

we tend to seek input
from those people who we know
will okay
thumbs up
or support that which we know
is likely the wrong route to take
but it is what we most want to hear

i take advice
i ask for advice

but alas
i do what the fuk i want anyways

i wore these for the first time yesterday morning
in the rain
to walk my pooch

and they fuk'n killed my heals



er

i mean

these kickass, funky, stylin' boots
are too cool for me
so i'm sellin'

to the highest bidder

so i could not go to the damien rice concert
last night

%jH^$#&*G%&YnFR




and by could not
i mean i was concerned about falling asleep standing

and i just don't have the skill
to unconscioulsy sway
gently in place

oh wait...


so i sold my ticket


and by sold
i mean

dear dank,

i sometimes struggle with defining myself
or more accurately
finding the words that embody
who i am

i once read a horoscope profile
for my sign

aquarius

it was me to a t
the phrases that struck me the most
are now a part of me

You want to express your ground-breaking spirit in everything you do.



You are a zesty individual, having tremendous amounts of energy.



why do it?

to remember

to have an eternal reminder
of who you really are
what you adore most
and what you must promise yourself
to never lose

went to see Genesis last night
man
phil collins could replace the energizer bunny
that dude went for three hours straight



2 more hours and the bandage comes off
then its off forever
and what lurks underneath
is
not


and i'm already
thinking about the next one

Hi Robyn,

We spoke briefly a few weeks ago about the possibility of me being on your show (The List) and you suggested that i send you my idea... well i would like to karaoke! i was thinking maybe the national anthem at a toronto sporting event or maybe just sing on a busy street corner. both ideas scare the crap out of me, but i want to do it. what better way to build character than to put yourself out there right?

anyways, my good friend anita put together a short You Tube video of me karaoking over the past couple of years:



i have my own system, PV microphones and throw tons of parties - with the words projected on the wall. sometimes i come home from work and belt out a song just for the hell of it.. and can be heard down the street.

i have to warn you though... i sing horribly. here is a short clip i taped of me singing one afternoon (keep the volume down :)



so let me know what you think... you can either email me or my cell number is 416-555-5555.

Thanks Robyn. Cheers! Sarah

ps. the name "radmad" which you see in the video is my online blog name... www.radmad.ca

she was finally ready to meet someone

who has the capacity
to break her heart

so you know that scene in Big Daddy
where adam sandler throws the log
in the path of the rollerbladers
as they fly down the hill
and then wipe out large



well that's what happened to me this morning

except adam sandler wasn't there
it was a superflat surface
and no twigs in sight

meg and i
went to Seduction on yonge
street
today

it was killer hot
in my pleather infested car

and i was wearing this dress
and i got out of the car

radmad: hey meg, can you see sweat on my back and ass?

meg: ummm no. but your left boob is showing

it's like my body just KNEW we were going into a sex shop
it's so smart
must be cause it's all back to school time
in the air

j-man got too distracted to effectively
and adequately enjoy
the blueberry pancake i left for him

then we went to yonge street tattoos
where he had an appointment to get a sweet
tat across him back
five hours later i had to bail
and take a street car home
that ended up stopping and kicking us all off
kinda far from my destination

burn




neaters and i shopped
for pretty girly things
for her to wear
so she could go out
and pick up
pretty girly things



i got these

and if it rains tomorrow



it's my fault

cause it means i successfully
rain danced
my ass off