radmad.ca

i wish stewy
lived on my street

so here we are again
my little friend




who were you then
and who are you now
that you can't pretend
that you can figure it all out
subtract out the impact
and the fall is all you get
so it takes two beers to remember now
and three more to forget

i will take good care of you this year
we have a long way to go together
we have good sleeps to look forward to
we have laughs
and cries
and finish lines to stomp on
as we have flushed the fine white ones

we will be happy
and we will be the free spirit
we have come to adore

and we will be one
to conquer our world
together
body and soul
because
we
is

me

she threw herself eagerly
in the paths of unsuitable men

so i went out and got a big person bed
this week

the university fouton
just wasn't cuttin it any more
i keep waking up thinking
i'm having a heart attack
because my body becomes so contorted

usually i can sleep on concrete
or even atop a moving train
but i need to have better sleeps
now that i have to run these fukn' far races

so i went into sleep country
with a budget
found 5 beds
laid on each once
found my favourite
went up to the sales guy
threw a frame on the order
and bammo!

in and out in t-minus 8 minutes

a girl can dream
that this will be the only
transaction
having to do with my new bed
that will be completed in such haste

so i'm going mobile
neaters made me these sweet bumper stickers
so if you want to join the radmad street team
well just let me know

cause i'm taking shameless self-promotion
to a whole new
and questionable
level

some marketing gurus out there may say
that to build an empire
you must have quality
value
and substance
to that is say
fuk it
it's all about traffic
and i'm about to be in it

when travelling down a long road
it is very hard
impossible perhaps
not to experience red lights

although they stop you dead in your tracks
and seem to be a negative and intrusive thing
just remember
that they protect you from those people
at that moment's intersection
who are crossing your path
and travelling in a very different direction
from the one you are on

if you are lucky enough
to only hit one or two red lights
on any single journey
it's not such a bad thing
and it sure makes you appreciate
the green lights that much more

you will rarely set out on a journey
without hitting both the red and the green
but when the proportions are in your favour
and there are more greens...
smile
cause they are the ones
that inevitabely get you
to where you want to be


besides

how much fun is it
making out at a red light

i always get reflective on christmas day
and think of all the things i miss
and the things i want to accomplish in life
and what i want to do better
and who i am thankful for and love
and how each day passes too fuk'n fast

enjoy life
it's short
and it's wonderful
and it's all we've got

there is an ani difranco song
on my computer

well there are lots

but it doesn't matter what i am doing
or how unwashed my hair is
or how i may still be in pj's
or holding a cup of yogurt in my hand
or wiping last night's make up from my eye

it doesn't matter what i am doing

but i will dance to this song

and what would a christmas party be
without at 2am game of frisbee
on the beach



raymi is an athlete
and i love her more and more every time
i see her




so after finally hitting the sheets at 6:30am
hanstar
who was MIA from the party
came over the next day
to crank out a tune or three

how could i say no?

by the sounds of things
with dank's peeps and my invites out there
i think there will be many to spread holiday cheer

if you would like to come and need details
email me

see what happens when i try to smile
for the camera

dorkness happens

if you come to my party
you can have one of these
bad boys



now with icing!

i don't like the fact
that the new Chipmunks Christmas CD
has a different David Seville
than the one who used to be on the record LP version
of the 80's

the self-portrait
of a birthday boy









thank you miss raymi
for the invite
and the ability to highjack your pictures
cause they were better than mine

i've never given much thought to
the whole idea of having an affair with a married man
it's just something i would never do
likely due to an enhanced sense of empathy
i have been burdened
or blessed with

last night i watched a pretty, young and unsuspectingly sly girl
make subtle
yet effective moves on a married man
in the hopes of winning his affection
which by the end of the night
she was rather effective at doing

it would seem that this little troya
has managed to be whisked away to beautiful islands
adorned in jewelery, belts and handbags
by unhappily married men
eager to please and bring yet one more smile to the face
of a young beauty




i think it's sad

during University
and then college
i held two jobs

one was powerwashing houses
climbing on rooftops
cleaning eavestroughs
out in the hot heat
yielding a wand blasting 3000 psi's

i had power

the other was baking cakes, pies
tarts, cookies, muffins etc
for Tim Horton's
i read recipes
wore an apron
and tied my hair back in a pretty pony tail

i had pinache

an oldie

but the silly thing still makes me giggle

himerus says:
i am getting a swedish massage at Elmwood tomorrow

himerus says:
how do you tactfully ask for a happy ending?

himerus says:
should I use the more professional term of "full release"?

radmad.ca says:
ask for the cinderella treatment

himerus says:
never heard of that'

radmad.ca says:
it's new

i spent a good hour putting on lights
ribbon
tinsel
decorations
while listening to the chipmunks christmas carols

then i stand and present it to my guests
taaa daaaa
and the fuk'n thing topples onto the floor
hitting me in the back and almost knocking me over




this is my favourite decoration

i'm glad she survived

oh and if you hear rumours
about me pushing a kid out of the way
while i was what kind of resembled skating
at the local outdoor rink
then they are unsubstantiated and untrue

unless you were there

in which case
you can vouch that the little brat had it coming


meh
i resigned back in june
to the fact that i was only getting coal this year