radmad.ca: August 2005

Monday, August 29, 2005

dolce

she played with barbies
so cute in her handmade dress
and aphgan
made with love with gramma

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now she thinks barbie
is a waify douche
with legs of lace
and heart of dust

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legs were made for speed
and for wrapping around
the torso of a darkhaired lover

posted by radmad

sj ages like vino

there is not much difference
between being seasick
and being hungover

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i should know
both snuck
under my belt this weekend
but let me say

being drunk
pre-hungover
makes the seasickness subside

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but nothing that a
nice bellyrub won't
sooth

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happy birthday my sweet!

posted by radmad

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Casanova

first he tells her how pretty
she is

then he gives her a look
that sends shivers
of hot lust
through her veins

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then he mounts
and goes until
she screams in ecxtasy

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or until we catch him
and he's all

"gosh, fukn' one more minute
till i'm done bitches"

posted by radmad

Thursday, August 18, 2005

shark bait

not everyone
gets the same kickstart
in life
that most of us do

but the strongest of these few
keep smiling despite the odds
smiling with big brown eyes

i wonder if
animal hospitals
allow helium balloons
that say
"get better fast,
cause there are sticks to eat,
squirrels to taunt and
pillows to romance"

posted by radmad

Monday, August 15, 2005

this women's work

i have met my match
and we did it our way

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kate bush came up from NYC
to rock a show on my kickass
karaoke machine

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it even does some sweet jumps

posted by radmad

on top of spagetti

i sing in it
i suntan in it
i grow my hair underneath it
i spray it with perfume
so it smells nice
i drink wine in it
and crown and diet
and turn down free drinks from
greasy mobsters cause i have a
cooler boyfriend in it
i go to rockshows in it
i contemplate the death penalty in it
i learn that Bertusi isn't a bad guy
in it
i even try to catch bitches
in it

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it's my hat

and it needs to be washed

posted by radmad

Saturday, August 13, 2005

grohltesque

damn damn damn
couldn't delve up the courage
enough
to ask martha
if it was really martha

sitting in the fukn'
or was it the furkin
pub

in other nothingness

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i have a date tonight
his name is dave
maybe if it goes well
i'll let my dad meet him

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posted by radmad

Thursday, August 11, 2005

exterminating since 1976

when you leap across the room
at five ten in the morning
to step on a centipede
cause they are fast
little fuk'rs

sometimes you will find
that a few of the legs
break free from the body
and wiggle about

then you wonder

if the fella can still breath...
then will be lead a happy
and productive life
as a sixty sevenepede?

posted by radmad

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

she wants me

tourist
in her own hood
why the fuk are you taking
a picture of that hydro box
oh
you're not
you're taking a picture of mine

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my new cool blonde chick friend
still the hippest ever
in my books
even when hungover
especially when doing shots
from our table

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inquisitive
and wondering why the chicken
has left the pizza crust
or was it even there
to begin with?

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posted by radmad

ureeka

red snapper
plus
incense to cover
the smell of the
red snapper
equals
an olfactoric calamity

posted by radmad

Sunday, August 07, 2005

aim shoot fire

arrowheads
were used by indians
to kill deer
and wild beasts
to place on fine china
dinner plates

arrowhead
is also a trotting ground
for the likes of city folk
who need to
get the fuk
outta town

posted by radmad